So I was reading In Colossians yesterday. I will confess that if I'm not in a book study I tend to be a Proverbs fall back kinda gal, or I'll go to read a book I haven't read in a while, if ever, but then I end up in Chronicles...not exactly what gets me going in the morning...so yesterday I chose Colossians because I will be doing a study in it soon. I got down to the end of chapter 2 (you can check that out if you want to see where my mind might have been at the moment) and my mind began to wander. Many of us do this. One minute I'm thinking that rules don't stop the indulgence of the flesh, then I think about what will stop that indulgence and naturally I think about Heaven and "Jesus, just come already" because then I won't have to worry about things like my weak flesh and how I get led astray so easily and...and...that leak in the bathroom. Oh that leak. I wouldn't have to worry about that stupid leak because I wouldn't have a house full of surprises around every turn. Oh why did we ever pull on another project? I know it was the best -if not only- option for us, but why, God? This is torture for us. I just want someone to rescue us here. Rescue this renovation. Come do it for us so we can be parents and just parents. So we can be husband and wife and not general contractor and laborer. Someone just rescue me. Please!
Then I start breaking into song, as I am known to do too often (and those of you who know this song, DON'T laugh...). Guess what song I sang? Oh, I know a select few of you have it going in your head right now..."Rescue me from the sin I seem to cling to. Rescue me from this fight within my soul. I need You to empower me with more of You so that in the end, with you I will be whole." Now, seeing as the author of this song may be reading this, I apologize if I butchered the lyrics...I was going off memory. But I digress. The point is, I was focusing on my current situation and I wanted (still want so desperately) to be rescued from it. The problem is, I have a far bigger problem in life that needs rescuing, as the song said. I tend to focus on my situation and not my sin. While I'm sure many of us do that, how many of us want to be rescued from sin as desperately as we want to be rescued from our bad situation? I'll be honest. I would give or do just about anything for someone to say "Here's $50,000; $100,000. Dig yourself out of this ditch (it's quickly becoming a deep ditch) and go take care of your family." I got you laughing now, right? It's not happening, is it? The reality is that I've been offered something greater than the means to fix my house...I've been offered the means to fix me. Would I give just about anything for that or am I too fixed on my situation to have time to pursue my Rescuer?
1 comment:
Bless your heart "Shelly"....and I guess I am one of those few who is allowed to call you that. I always look forward to your blogs because you are such a remarkable writer, and it's just a joy to read what you have to say. As I read this, though, with mixed feelings for what you are going through now, I feel so bad about your new housing situation, and all you are going through....again. At the same time, I am so proud of you for the realization you have that you do have something better. You are truly grounded in the Lord, and He will bring you through all this....unless Jesus takes us all home first! You are in my prayers. I know things are very discouraging for you now, and each day is different. You are, and always have been, a strong person, and I know you can handle all this, with the Lord's help. Thank you for this post, and for an insight into what's going on in your mind. I know better how to pray for you now.
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