Pollyanna! Pollyanna!

I have a computer again.  Tim has had my computer at work with him since he started in early July, so that is my delinquency excuse this time.

We have been in Iowa for a couple months now and we still aren't settled.  Not in the sense that I would like.  We are knee deep in a school that the kids like, the older boys are in football, we have met tons of new people that we have begun friendships with, we love our church family and can't believe we got so lucky to live so close to Tim's work, but we are by no means settled.  We are living in a rental that was an answer to prayer, for sure, but it's still a rental; a temporary home.  Our house in Indiana has not sold yet, and it holds half of our belongings including all personalization we own.

Our rental has no pictures on the walls and no decorations either.  In the bigger picture of life, that is not really important, I'd agree.  However, if I'm to be honest, I will tell you that it's beginning to wear on me; on my emotions.  I want to be able to be the best mom and wife that I can be and I find that more often than not, I am discouraged that I know we are going to be packing up and moving...again.

Up until recently, we had no idea where we were going to move.  We have been looking at every house that would come on the market in our price range, trying above all things, to get a move-in ready house.  We have been living in "projects" (not to be confused with "the projects") for 10 years, technically, and I very much wanted to be done.  There have been no houses come up in good proximity to the kids' school, the church and town that wouldn't be a complete project.  We don't want a project.  Did I say that already?

I was getting discouraged, to say the least, that every house that was in move-in condition, that would fit the 7 of us, was out of our price range.  Does anyone have an extra $250,000???  That's how much over budget the house was that I thought was perfect.  For once, we could move in, unpack and live.  Period.  We could absorb the impact of this move without distraction.  We could be mom and dad to these kiddos and not jip them of our time and energy because we were fixing a house that was in disrepair.  Did I mention I didn't want anything to do with a project?  I'm sure you know where I'm headed by now.

What's the title of that song????  ♫♪"Oops, we did it again?"♫♫  Yeah.  We did.  We went and signed on to buy (renting it until our house sells) another fixer-upper.  Dear Lord, You know my heart...and my level of sanity here...what gives?  Do we never get to be the people who pay someone to do this stuff?  Is this really the only way to get a house to fit us...in our budget?  Inhale through the nose.  Exhale out the mouth.  Ok.  We have to do it again, and here it is:

Things to be thankful for (and there are many):  The exterior is done.  There is a large, pretty lot.  There are original 1940's hardwood floors throughout the original house.  There has been an addition put on of a huge family room and an office.  There are enough rooms for the boys to each have their own, something we feel we need to try for a bit.  It is 4 minutes from church.  It is over 10 minutes closer to town.  There are no gravel roads.  There is an awesome campfire area already put together in the back yard.

I feel a bit like Pollyanna playing the glad game.  I guess I am.  For the sake of this blog entry and those reading it, I will refrain from the list of complaints and woe-is-me-isms that I have and focus on being Pollyanna.  God is still good when I have to live with sub-flooring instead of carpet.  He's still good when we see water dripping from behind the siding near the backdoor and He's still good when standard toilets won't fit in the space they're supposed to go in.

Were those backdoor complaints?  Maybe.  I just choose to see them as truths and glimpses of a bigger picture.  A picture where no matter what, we are going to be living in the place that God provided for us and it's a house that He wanted us to get and I have to believe that the steps it took to get me to be content with taking on another dad-gum project were steps used to bring my focus off myself and perhaps even off what I don't have rather than what I do.  In the meantime, I will try not to care that the bathtub and surround need to have a lot of thought put in to them to figure out how to conceal the flanges left behind without looking hillbilly...somehow...and instead, I will be thankful for finally finding the house that will allow us to get settled into our new life here in Iowa.